Thoughts.

Written at Monday, July 2, 2007 | back to top

我想念去年的冬天，下着雪的那一夜，

你给的温柔紧握的双手，温暖整个寒冬，

失去了曾经的拥有，在你离开以后，

带走了笑容，只留下寂寞，

忘了幸福是什么。。。。

没有你的夜特别的漆黑，只能闭上双眼去感觉，

没有我的夜谁在你身边，代替了那个从前。。。。

能不能再听一次你说爱我，

回到还在你怀里的时候。。。。

能不能让我，再一次拥有曾属于我的温柔。。。。

out of all e songs..tis is e song－再一次拥有　which would best fit my feelings..

everytime when i hear a sad song..thoughts of u will juz flow to my mind..till today,i still dun wan to think tat u actually lied to me..i keep clinging to e hope tat all u hav every said is e truth..

cg told me on wed(or is it tue) tat u msged her n said tat ur phone is spoilt n tat u were busy with work..

i dun noe how true is tat..coz it also didnt sound like u..n then donkey told me tat u tell him tat u nv receive his msg(tat i ask him to send)..n i hav decided to let u be aka as mr wan yan bu po..完颜不破..it's one of e characters from 我和僵尸有个约会III..perhaps coz tis was one of e shows tat i told u tat i m watchin n also,coz i wanted a chim-na name so i decided to use mr wan yan bu po..

u noe right..it's really funny how come i nv get such feelings with other ppl..

it's like even for e cj guy,we did msg n somemore met to go for curia..n even though he stop msgin after 2 weeks but e sadness tat i felt merely lasted 2 weeks..

but then..after 2 weeks plus,e sadness coz of u still cant be vanished..

ohya..n cha will be aka as mr ming yun(also another character from that show)

n even though i intend not to msg mr ming yun anymore but i dun quite feel any sadness..even though mr ming yun n i hav msged e longest..but seriously,there doesnt quite seem to be any kind of sadness within me..

perhaps coz someone told me he's a flirt n perhaps,he really is one..or perhaps,wo dui ta mei you dui ni na zhong hao gan..or shld i say gan jue..

n also mayb as wat sandra tell me before(when u juz break up with ur bf,but u constantly hav someone to msg n to distract u,u wont feel any sadness nor emptiness)..(although she used e word-bf,but for my context,i dun hav e word bf hor..)

n true n indeed,i did msg jeanette today n also,talk to donkey to prevent any sadness tat i m feel from stop smsin mr ming yun..but i think e smses n chat r a bit needless coz it seem pretty pointless to carry on coz mr ming yun also dun seem to wan n also coz of his personality..

e emptiness u(mr wan yan bu po) caused in my heart is really so great..sometimes,i juz msg mr ming yun to fill tat emptiness n to stop thinkin of u for a while..but i noe if i cont doin tis,i m juz bluffin myself..

because i didnt want to cont bluffin myself,i also decide to stop smsin mr ming yun..

a fren told me tis today-i told u all guys r idiots..dun mix with them la

in e past before i noe u,whenever i stop msgin someone,there wld be some sort of emptiness for a while..but after 2 weeks or so,i wont feel any emptiness..

but with u..it's totally diff..2 weeks++ hav passed,but that emptiness within me juz wont seem to subside..n sometimes,it juz get worse..

i dun really noe wat i wan..do i wanna see u or do i juz wanna cont msg..

n sometimes,frankly speakin,i seem unsure of my feelings..

..i juz bury myself in tears at e thought of u..

..i juz bury myself in tears at e thought of our partin..