Thoughts.

Written at Sunday, February 24, 2008 | back to top

sat..

ohmann,almost tis whole day sucks lah..

we got some juniors tat are..dotz..

n accordin to yh,my bag caused her to fall down>.<..

i feel damn sway lah..ystd was e mug incident n today tis..

sway

sway!

sway!!..

its either tat or today's yh retribution day..coz yh's buddy is e same pattern as her but even worse de..

she's a combination of so many ppl..

sth tells me yh has known a stalker?..

n then right,tat time its yh push bear n she fell on both knees n now,yh kena n fortunately,fell on one side of e knee..

anw,she was ex nice n brave n cont to go for mass despite tat..

n she happily help me donate $1 to e church..i still feel very xin teng for e fact tat i dun quite like church n im donatin $1?..i rather donate tat to my flag day tin lah;/..

waited with yh for her dad to come..then went with jonathan to dinner..

we had quite a long chat..n ya,it kinda woke me up..

after these past 7mths,sth in me feel really weird..

it felt sth was missin yet i noe not wat..

it felt i wanna go tian pu ta but juz feel too lazy..

however,e thing to note is tat,tat feelin is off n on..right now,i dun quite feel it..

but serisly speakin,its time i

learn how to let go of e memories n e hurt?..

learn how to accept all tat has happened?..

learn how to forgive?..

learn how to hav e right mindset n perception?..

learn how to pray more often?..

ahh rahh,i dun quite noe where to start n i feel kinda fearful..n durin tis whole period,i think der'll b many a times tat i will seem totally hypocrite n wat lah..

list an example:

im a damn suan-er towards religion now n i dun wana go everythin n anythin n even influence ppl tat..so previously when peggy ask me if she shld go church,i told her like not to go..

but if now,if im gonna start gettin back on track,i wld hav to tell her e right thing which is to go church..

however e irony is tat im tellin her e right thing to go church yet me mysef dun hav e xin qing n mood to go church both physically n spiritually..

n isnt tat = a hypocrite..

ahh rahh,i feel like im back to square one..

ohgod..ohmothermary..

if only i could die in front of you or you could just exactly tell me wat to do..

life's nv fair..

but why is it unfair to a point tat other catholics like yh need not experience tis at my age..

blur-ity makes one not mature..i aint mature enuf to experience it..